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Boundaries Back up, they don’t love you like I love you "The only people who get upset about you setting boundaries are the ones who were benefiting from you having none." – Unknown, but probably Beyoncé Establishing healthy boundaries is crucial work; work that we need to be proactive about, considering how often they’re encroached upon. What are boundaries? They’re the guidelines, rules or limits that a person creates to identify reasonable, safe and permissible ways for other people to behave towards them. They also determine the necessary consequences when someone crosses the line. This session provides the space to explore your own boundaries and provides a literal recipe for defining them (for yourself and others). Like a recipe for banana bread except it’s less likely to fall flat. Please note: I can’t bake. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5b36af227106992e73a89432/1559842641758-EXG1IBZOULO65UJXZLHU/new_values.gif The Fundamentals - 1.) Values “Why are you the way that you are?” -Michael Scott By definition, values are a person's principles or standards of behavior; one's judgment of what is important in life. That means they drive our behaviour and influence our intentions, for better or for worse, whether we’re aware of them or not. A greater awareness of your own values will enable you to make decisions that are better in alignment with what matters most to you. This session will help you pinpoint and define your values, increasing your self-awareness and allowing for greater clarity around your choices and behaviour. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5b36af227106992e73a89432/1559842981734-K76T1YH7JBF78W1RU2IL/assertive.gif The Fundamentals - 3.) Assertiveness “I just took a DNA test, turns out I’m 100% that bitch.” -Lizzo Assertiveness resides smack dab in the centre of the spectrum that spans from avoidance to aggression. Being assertive means being able to stand on your own side in a calm and respectful way, without being either aggressive or passively accepting fault. It’s knowing what’s okay and what’s not. It’s knowing what you’ll tolerate and what you won’t. Guess who tends to struggle with assertiveness the most? If you guessed “womxn”, you’re right! If you thought- “I guess maybe it might be womxn…?” and then immediately dismissed the idea because you assumed it was wrong, you’re probably leaning towards the avoidance end of that spectrum and we need to talk ASAP. https://www.noctuacoaching.com/oneoff-workshops daily 0.75 2019-09-21 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5b36af227106992e73a89432/1559844639462-K7B3PEAR3RJNWM346SUV/communication.gif One-Off Workshops - Communication Skills Say something (I’m giving up on you) This session is designed to help even the most nervous public speaker communicate effectively, putting what might have otherwise been a useless amount of time and money spent on a University-level-theatre-education to good use. I learned two things studying theatre. #1. I did not want to act, and #2. a whole lot about humans and the power of presence and nuance. Throughout the course of this session we’ll discuss what makes a person compelling (versus a bore or a blowhard). We’ll practice ways to reassure our bodies that we’re okay and in control when we find ourselves in situations where our mind is doing its very best to convince us we’re not. We’ll take some time to learn about the other ways in which people approach the world, allowing us to more effectively meet people where they are, while still remaining authentic to ourselves. Please note: this session features an image of Jeff Goldblum topless. If you want to know why you’ll just have to attend the workshop (but also, why do you need a reason…?). https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5b36af227106992e73a89432/1560280230221-QJ9M4E7MRYIR034C5YNR/gaslighting.gif One-Off Workshops https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5b36af227106992e73a89432/1559845866076-ZUTCG8W0FZV61969O2CF/odds.gif One-Off Workshops https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5b36af227106992e73a89432/1561085408268-VDKAIIMVI7BZUENSGUGW/nooooo.gif One-Off Workshops - Bluebeard’s Castle: Unlocking the Door A session created upon request from womxn who suspect that their friends may be ensnared in a toxic or abusive relationship. Loved ones on the outside looking in, who feel helpless and at a loss. Rather than answer the question— “What can I do?” (because we all know the unfortunate answer is “not much”)— the aim of this session is to provide a safe space to have the hard conversations and determine what the next necessary step will be. The focus is not advice giving, making judgement calls or providing definitive answers. Instead, we’ll consider the crossroads ahead based upon each unique set of circumstances. The importance of personal boundaries and self-care will be prioritized, and important resources will be provided. Please note: if you suspect that you might be in an abusive relationship- or know someone who is- and are fearful of immediate threat, I encourage you to peruse this resource https://www.justice.gc.ca/eng/cj-jp/fv-vf/help-aide.html It contains a list of Provincial/Territorial resources, as well as public legal education translated into numerous languages. You are not alone. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5b36af227106992e73a89432/1561095470059-HU0CEAEWMPDPZAYCC26V/bail.gif One-Off Workshops https://www.noctuacoaching.com/custom daily 0.75 2019-06-06 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5b36af227106992e73a89432/1558598500823-7CV7U9DILE25OUDAGI2W/image-asset.jpeg Custom - Curated Sessions Need something customized for you or your business? I’d love to help! And if it turns out I’m not the best person to meet your needs, I’d be happy to recommend someone from my own network. Please note: diversity and inclusivity is a hugely important topic. While I certainly aim to make my own work inclusive, I am still a white, straight woman, and so if you’re looking to broaden your own perspective (and are going to pay somebody to do it) I’d suggest reaching out to one of the excellent people I love learning from (and pay them instead). Find them on my Resource page. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5b36af227106992e73a89432/1558598421707-3E3BUDV40NNH0R2BCGCF/MeghanTalks-01485.jpg Custom - Personal Session A one-on-one session is helpful when you’re ready to take the next step in the right direction and need a personal approach. Any and all of the workshops can be delivered in a one-on-one setting, allowing us to delve more deeply into the subject matter and/or relate the content specifically to your own experiences. This option is also recommended if you’d like to explore more personal topics you’re less comfortable sharing in a group setting (or are just the person most likely to go sit with the cat at a party). Please note: sessions are not intended to take the place of what a licensed therapist or emergency services can provide. Please read the disclaimer for the sake of transparency. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5b36af227106992e73a89432/1558598457259-2XK9I8NJKSIRY7QBFSWI/MeghanTalks-02226.jpg Custom - Group Accountability Do you want to work on establishing strong boundaries or becoming more assertive? Do you have a few friends who could benefit from the same work (and who could be trusted to help hold you accountable afterwards)? I’d love to work with you! Let me know which session or topic appeals to you, and we’ll work out an approach that suits your needs. Everything is customizable, so please don’t hesitate to get curious, no matter how big or small the group. I’ve spoken to groups that range in sizes from 3 to 200+ and not once have I ever had to envision anyone naked. 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